Tuesday, March 5, 2013

frogs and dogs

Earlier today, with hand over heart, Princess accidentally said, “I pledge allegiance to the frog.” Then, with visions of patriotic frogs hopping in her mind, she couldn't remember the rest of the words to the pledge at all. Paranoid that her homeroom students would realize this flub and think she’s a big dummy, she whipped out the old choir trick and watermelon-ed her way through the rest of it. No one caught on that Princess wasn't being her usual patriotic self, and Princess feels she kind of deserves an Oscar. Or at least a nap. Now Princess cannot stop thinking about frogs, and suddenly feels that they’re really funny. AND Princess is wearing green right now, AND she kind of hopped in the rain this morning, which was pretty amphibious.

Also, the pups got fixed last week, and no, THEY DO NOT WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT. They are both supposed to wear cone necklaces so that they don’t lick the unlickables. Yesterday Princess came up to see her dogs and they were looking at her like this: 

Princess noticed Ebenezer was not wearing his cone of shame, and Uzi was hanging his head low, which is quite out of character for the proud creature. Upon further examination, Princess realized Uzi was a little weighed down because he had on TWO cones of shame. Confused by the whole situation, Princess rolled her eyes at his husband's strange logic that would lead him to remove Ebenezer’s cone and add it to Uzi’s neck. She texted Husband:

Princess: Hey dummy why is Uzi wearing two cones?
Husband: ???
Princess: Uzi is wearing two cones and Ebs is wearing none! Confused! Why you do that?
Husband: I didn't do that...
Princess: Ummmm

So then Princess looked at her dogs with bewilderment. How did Magical Ebenezer wriggle free from the cone of shame and make it reappear round the neck of his brother Uzi?

Princess had this conversation with them:

Princess: Magical Ebenezer! Explain yourself!
Magical Ebenezer: A magician never reveals his secrets bark bark.
Princess: Uzi! What say you regarding this confounding atrocity?
Uzi: Grr grr sad face.

That is all.

(P.S. Look below and you shall see little feedback squares that allow you to pat Princess on the back or crush her soul. Clickity click now, and DON'T CLICK THE WRONG ONE.)

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