Friday, August 24, 2012

naturally

Mood: Green
Nail Color: Impress French Manicure
Day's Inspiration: Psalm 98:4 "Shout for joy to the Lord, all the earth."

Once Princess went outside and took an artsy picture in hopes that she would seem earthy.
She doesn't like the way the nature makes her nose look.

Today Princess walked somewhere when she could have driven. This felt very earthy and green and eco-friendly, and Princess found herself feeling like she should adopt a whale. This is unusual because Princess remembers childhood bestie Claire adopting a whale and having a whale bumper sticker in her closet, and Princess remembers that this made no sense to her.

Princess kind of has a cold heart with regard to nature and animals. Sometimes people will be like, “OHMIGOSH A BUNNY!!!! LOOK AT THE BUNNY!!! BUUUUNNEEEE” and Princess is like, “Eh.” And then people are like “I LOVE FLOWERS AND GARDENING IN MY YARD!!!!” and Princess is like, “Isn’t that where the flies live?” She also scoffs at the one-eyed cats on those Sarah McLaughlin commercials. Her sister will cry about them, and Princess is all “STOP IT THEY ARE ACTORS.”
Princess took a Howard Gardner Multiple Intelligences test during teacher in-service, and she got a "0" for Naturalist Intelligence, which means Princess needs to stay inside. She already knew this based on her abusive relationship with the sun. She’s had billions of horrific sun beatings but Princess keeps going back for more. Therapy needed.
In light of these examples, it was strange that Princess took that walk and then felt the urge to adopt a whale. What is happening? She doesn’t even know who she is anymore, especially because she recently rediscovered a love for horses. She loved them as a kid because of her Lisa Frank horse folder that was so saturated with color that it burned her eyes and captured her heart forever. But then she got on a horse and fell off. And then she got on another horse and fell off and the horse almost stomped on her head. And then she went to Claire’s birthday party and they gave her Old Maid because they knew she was scared of the horses and Old Maid GOT LOST IN THE FOREST AND PRINCESS WAS ALL BY HERSELF LOST AND CRYING IN HER DENIM SUNFLOWER HAT. So Princess swore off horses forever. But then she discovered @WeirdHorse on Twitter and on at least 10 occasions Princess has laughed so hard she cried. And THEN she saw a horse painting at Pier 1 and kind of wanted it. That’s embarrassing.
Anyway, on Princess’ walk she saw many weird things such as forks and a crusty toothbrush. This was disturbing because it diminished the charm of her walk and offended her whale loving heart. And then she thought SOMEDAY I WILL WANT TO STROLL ON THIS STREET WITH MY FUTURE BABY CHILD IN A PRAM AND THESE ITEMS ARE UNACCEPTABLE. So she’s thinking of adopting a whale AND organizing a street cleanup.
Also, when Princess returned from her walk she watched The Hills, Season 2. Since hills are considered a landform, this also counts towards boosting her naturalist intelligence.
So, in conclusion: reduce, reuse, recycle, save the whales, go green, adopt the sad puppies, blah blah blah.

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