Thursday, August 4, 2011

oxymoron

Snooty literaries will attest that Romeo was speaking of the seemingly bipolar agony/bliss of his love towards Rosaline. (Yes, remember her, Romeo? You like looooved her more than anything and then married/killed yourself over Juliet mere days later? Real cool.) But Princess knows that this passage is better applied to her current state of mind over Celtic Woman.

If you’ve turned on PBS lately (maybe the cable went out), you’ve likely seen the Celtic Woman phenomenon, and chances are, you reacted like Princess: thoroughly annoyed yet captivated and unable to change the channel. O loving hate! Or as Beyonce more eloquently put it, "Is this a sweet dream or a beautiful nightmare?"

Celtic Woman makes Princess’ skin crawl and sprit soar simultaneously, much to her chagrin. It’s like, the twitchy blonde fiddle player makes her so ANGRY and sends her head spinning with endless questions. (Why is she twitching? Does her neck hurt after a performance? Is she really attractive or sort of ugly? Does she think she is a fairy? Is she the kind of person that spells fairy like “faeire”? Does she speak elvish? Does she take clogging lessons?) Then, those perfectly harmonized corsets saunter out, all hip sways and mermaid skirts and Princess’ has to bang her head on the wall to stop the questions. (How serious is their Lord of the Rings obsession? How many corsets do they own? Do they have to share corsets? Are they hitting notes that only dogs can hear? Do they like the fiddler girl or are they jealous because she gets to dance? Are they jealous of Enya? Who has the biggest dressing room?) All the songs are interspersed with odd Irish landscape scenes and shots of the percussionists wearing sleeveless shirts. The latter image in particular usually brings Princess’ questions to a screeching halt, in only the way that a ponytailed man in a sleeveless shirt can.

Still, even with all the questions and the ponytails, Princess can’t bring herself to change the channel because it’s like the fairies have put a mystical spell on her, and she finds herself looking up the tour schedule to see when they’re coming to town. WHAT IS THIS?!?! Oh Romeo, what truth you speak! This love feel I, that feel no love in this.

Dost thou not laugh?


No, really, if you want to laugh and/or find a name that will help you fit in with the Celtic Woman crowd should you ever find yourself at an Irish castle in an empire waist dress and flowers in your hair, check out this website: http://www.emmadavies.net/fairy/

Princess joyously received the following results:

Your fairy is...
Nettle Goblinwand
She brings riches and wealth.
She lives in brambles and blackberry bushes.
She is only seen when the seer holds a four-leafed clover.
She wears purple and green like berries and leaves and has gentle green wings like a butterfly.

1 comment:

  1. Did not know you had a blog! I love blogging (my blog is all about my kids....imagine that!)so I will have to drop in and read yours now too!

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